
Just your basic Trump fan brooch featuring GOOD GOD, IS THAT HUMAN HAIR???
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
I understand that the U.S. is not the center of the universe, but you’d have to be living in another galaxy to have missed the circus that is the current U.S. presidential election cycle.
As usual, everyone with an opinion and a hot glue gun has jumped on the bandwagon. The election-themed items range in sentiment from over-enthusiasm to rabid opposition, and from clever and funny and interesting to odd and weird, to bizarre and WTF, all the way to can’t-be-unseen. (And don’t click here. Seriously. Don’t.)
While I tried to be fair and give all candidates equal time, there wasn’t nearly as much fun stuff featuring Ted Cruz or John Kasich, and like the occupants of the clown car themselves, merchandise about Ben Carson, Marco Rubio, Chris Christie, and Jeb Bush is slowly fading away. (Thank heaven.) And there were other … let’s call them candidates … proposed as well.
As usual, links to the items for sale appear below each picture. For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts.

Ted Cruz head in a jar, A.K.A. Get-on-the-Secret-Service-Watchlist kit. By LittleJarsOfHorror

Do you think the internet will be full of butthurt about how much Bill spends on HIS outfits for state events? By bougeak

I’m not sure Bernie Sanders would entirely approve of this “Feel the Bern” stash jar, but they sure did get the hair right. By TheStickyStash

Couldn’t have said it better myself! By Parachute425

Donald Trump Piñata. It may not look that big, but trust me. It’s huuuuge. By PinataCenter

Satisfying as this is, it was actually ghost-written by Jimmy Kimmel’s staff. By MyKwilwin

Wow. Bernie is older than I thought! By takewinggallery

I don’t want it on my house, but as a piece of satire, this Donald Trump weathervane really is amazing. (There’s a Ted Cruz edition, too!) By Davidcoppersmith

This made me laugh out loud. By ThePinkHousePress

Thoroughly adorable Bernie necklace. By TinHaus

Finally, a remake I’m excited about! By WindowSwag

Donald Trump pet wig. If this isn’t animal abuse, I don’t know what is.

Hillary as Spongebob. As unexpected as this is, it’s not the artist’s most unusual work

Well, here’s something for everyone! Embroidered toilet paper! By TheShoutOutShop

Okay, but once the election’s over, no matter who wins, you’re that girl who carries a head purse.

Does this come with pins? Because it looks like it should come with pins. By HouseofMystics

Now THERE’s a candidate I can get behind! By AchtungTShirtLLC
April 28, 2016 at 6:39 am
I so desperately want to comment…..but I am somewhat baffled. Really Baffled. I mean TOTALLY BAFFLED. I have to suppose there are lots of voters who are going to feel that way come election day.
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April 28, 2016 at 7:19 am
I imagine that’s so.
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April 28, 2016 at 8:00 am
That human hair brooch reminded me of the first 5 minutes of ‘Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt’ (available on Netflix) where this girl joins a doomsday cult after the ‘reverend’ buys her hair off craigslist, lmao
the show is pretty cool, it’s set in NYC an’ all. but maybe you’ve seen it already 🙂
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April 28, 2016 at 9:02 am
Not only have I seen it, I finished binge-watching Season 2 yesterday! I absolutely love it. So funny!
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April 28, 2016 at 10:11 am
She was my favorite character from ‘The Office’ as well. 🙂 Did you like that show as well?
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April 28, 2016 at 12:57 pm
Loved, loved, loved!
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April 28, 2016 at 8:02 am
lmao jimmy kimmel, huuuugggggeeee
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April 28, 2016 at 9:02 am
He’s amazing.
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April 28, 2016 at 12:33 pm
All of these items are pretty horrible – some are well-crafted but I still would not own them – but still not as horrible as the prospect of a Trump presidency.
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April 28, 2016 at 12:57 pm
Amen, sister!
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April 28, 2016 at 12:59 pm
I confess I bought a Leslie Knope for president button (Knope We Can!)
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April 28, 2016 at 1:03 pm
Oh that one was pretty splendid. I also added the My Little Pony button to my favourites since my kids are Bronies.
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April 28, 2016 at 1:05 pm
Bronies are so much less creepy when they’re not adults!
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April 28, 2016 at 1:07 pm
Ha ha! I don’t think my kids qualify anyway as they like the TV show and have some MLP Funko Pops but otherwise don’t do any MLP stuff.
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April 28, 2016 at 1:10 pm
Good.
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April 28, 2016 at 5:52 pm
I think you guys are missing out on my Donald Dick…lol….badjamminmammie.etsy.com. hes the real thing. Show us your Dick Donald!
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April 29, 2016 at 12:25 am
Your items are hilarious! Donald was funny, but Trump items are easy to find. Bernie was a lot more effective for my purposes. Thanks for the visit!
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