Let me start this by mentioning that we have lost an uncomfortable number of people over the last month. It started with a friend who lost her years-long battle with cancer, followed by my darling Aunt Peggy. Following Peg’s funeral, we suddenly started hearing about the deaths of a lot – and I do mean a LOT – of other friends, friendly acquaintances, neighbors, and colleagues, all in rapid succession. Some we knew were poorly, some had health struggles of which we were unaware, and at least one sweet young father just dropped dead out of the blue. The always-awful month of January decided to step it up a notch, and slashed its way through our people like it was a movie murderer on a mission. It was disorienting and a bit frightening to learn of so many deaths in just a few weeks. There was even a week when we lost someone every single day.

Not surprisingly, I started thinking about my own mortality and what I would do differently if I knew I was going to become one of January’s fallen. (Please heaven let January be the end of it. I am running out of tissues and black clothes.)

A couple of years ago, I wrote about the luminous poet Andrea Gibson (they/them). After a long and terrible bout with cancer, in July of 2025, Gibson left this Earth, but not before they gave us one last amazing gift. Last night, I watched a magnificent documentary about Gibson, their career, their writing, their disease, their friendships, and the love of their life, and I feel like it has permanently changed me, I think for the better.

When we’re (read: I’m) feeling low or stressed or overwhelmed, it’s easy to find distractions. Social media, streaming tv and movies, dumb games on our phones, the modern world is full of ways to tune out. But this documentary about Gibson shows how they consciously tuned back in when they realized their remaining time was short, and what a gift that was to them and to their people. I don’t want to wait until it’s too late to remember to be present. I want to do better. This movie makes me want to do better.

If you have Apple TV, I really recommend you get yourselves a box of tissues, a comfortable seat, and some private time (you will ugly cry) to watch Come See Me In the Good Light. It is full of love and sweetness and sadness, and it may help you, too, to not look away when life gets hard.

Wishing you all love.