My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Give It a Rest

34 Comments

bed 0

As distressing as the big pointy bird canopy is, it’s the giant, scary bird feet that really freak me out.

“I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Currently, a number of my friends and relatives are looking for furniture, beds in particular. Of course, I can never resist the (obsessive) urge to try to find everyone exactly what they are looking for, so I’ve been hunting around for them. During my late-night searches, I have come across quite a few bizarre options, and not just on Etsy! I decided that like the post I wrote about chairs last year (“No, Thanks. I’ll Stand“), I had to share with you some of the more ridiculous beds I’ve encountered.

I guess if the parents have the bird bed, this wouldn't be an illogical bed for the kid's room.

I guess if the parents have the bird bed, this nest bed wouldn’t be an illogical choice for the kid’s room.

Balls! This bed/seating system is comprised of 120 foam balls which can be configured in a number of ways. At least it's not boring!

Balls! This bed/seating system is comprised of 120 foam balls which can be configured any way you like. I know it seems goofy, but if it’s good enough for Sir Patrick Stewart, it’s good enough for me!

This doesn't look terribly stable, but I love it anyway. Makes me want to head out to Ruffle Bar and drag back the boat in my header!

This doesn’t look terribly stable, but I love it anyway. Makes me want to head out to Ruffle Bar and drag back the boat in my header!

This looks like something slept upon by a Disney princess. Alas, no. It's real. Can you imagine the spoiled brats that sleep on this thing?

Ack. More birds. This looks like something slept upon by a Disney princess, and I do not mean that as a compliment. Unfortunately, it’s real. Can you imagine the spoiled brat that sleeps on this thing?

Oh, Etsy. $45,000 will buy you this weird eyesore.

On my beloved Etsy, $45,000 will buy you this weird eyesore. I assume this is what hipsters with neckbeards and trust funds sleep on. (Don’t miss the possessed cat in the corner!)

I always thought the 'B' in 'BLT' was bacon.

A BLT (Bed, lettuce & tomato). I always thought the ‘B’ was bacon.

Stainless steel and stained glass bed, which comes in many colors. Yes, please!

While I would likely smash it in my sleep, accidentally slit my own throat, and wake up dead, this stained glass bed is really beautiful to look at. From a safe distance, of course.

The standing bed. Because your feet don't hurt enough already.

The standing bed by Ernesto Neto. Because lying down just takes too long.

The modern bed of nails from Sweden allegedly cures everything “from schizophrenia to dandruff.” Sounds like snake oil to me.

The modern bed of nails from Sweden allegedly cures everything “from schizophrenia to dandruff.” Sounds legit.

New Rococo, favored by vampires everywhere.

This belongs in Goth Barbie’s Dream House, though I bet this guy would love it, too.

This one makes me feel all mermaidy!

This one makes me feel all mermaidy!

Even if you slept in only this position, what happens when the alarm goes off or the phone rings?

What happens when the alarm goes off or your phone rings or someone is wearing leopard slippers?

This is a rocking bed. It actually looks very comfortable, and I think it's quite stylish, too. I include the picture because the designer only put out pictures of models on the bed wearing lampshades on their heads.

This is a rocking bed. It actually looks very comfortable, and I think it’s quite stylish, too. I couldn’t resist including the picture because the designer has a thing for models voluntarily wearing lampshades on their heads.

Google calls this the "most beautiful bed in the world." It's sweet, I guess, but way too fussy for me.

Google calls this the “most beautiful bed in the world.” I don’t know. I think it’s kind of fussy. And what’s with the skull over the pillows?

I've always been fascinated by Chinese opium beds, but I've not yet succeeded at convincing someone to buy one. That doesn't stop me from trying!

I’ve always been fascinated by Chinese opium beds, but I’ve not yet succeeded at convincing someone to buy one. That doesn’t stop me from trying!

This bed made from a vintage truck is spectacular. Look at those lines!

This bed made from a vintage truck is spectacular. Look at those lines!

No.

No. (You know this is sold on Etsy, right?)

Designer Kayla Kromer started with a round mattress from the seventies. The rest, she says, “Just kind of happened.”

Whatever you do, don't touch the cheese.

Whatever you do, don’t touch the bird seed.

Admitting you have a Facebook problem is the first step to recovery.

Admitting you have a Facebook problem is the first step toward recovery.

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

34 thoughts on “Give It a Rest

  1. OK, I looked. what was it made of? Mahogany?

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You made my day! How much I was missing in life! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. If you chose the bed made exactly to your sleep shape–doesn’t that rule out having company over. Granted you don’t need the bed for the intimate parts–but maybe one of you will get tired.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ack, that shell bed and the “trap” bed…I’d live in constant fear they would drop on me and suffocate me. A claustrophobic’s nightmare is not conducive to a good night’s sleep. I do like the idea of a round bed with pillows all over so i could rotate and sleep in any direction, but maybe not a nest…

    Liked by 1 person

    • I attempted to sleep on a round bed once. The pillows fell off the stupid thing all night, and I never knew which way the flat sheet was supposed to go. I’m not claustrophobic, but I do require a neat bed in order to sleep. I hated it!

      Like

  5. Some of those beds were a little claustrophobic to say the least! I liked the BLT and burger ones, but would not want to sleep in one! Some really wacky ideas there!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow, some of those are kinda horrifying. And expensive. An opium bed would be amazing, though…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Have you ever seen one in person? They’re really stunning. There’s usually at least one for sale at ABC Carpet in NYC if you’re ever in the area. That place is totally worth a trip even without the opium beds.

      Like

  7. Excellent post. I needed a good laugh today.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. The first thing I thought of when I saw the nest bed was how much dust it would collect. Then I almost lost that thought scrolling through the rest (the clam shell and the trap made me claustrophobic just looking at them).

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Penis bed was phenomenally insane. Loved the little nest, though. Very sweet.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. you’ve gotta just love the creativeness of some wonderful folks when it comes to design!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. this is exactly why airbnb is hit or miss.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Wow. I went on your blog to thank you for liking “Disco Kitty Cat” and saw the beds. I will be reblogging this pm. Can you even imagine having enough money to think more than ten minutes on what kind of bed you need?

    aloha,
    Pam

    Liked by 1 person

    • Actually, I have enough money to think for weeks about what kind of bed I need, but I also have a tight enough budget that it will take me 100+ hours of research to find something I both love and can afford.

      Like

  13. ….the quote is my favorite part!!!!! Not sure about that mermaidy bed….looks more like a mermaid coffin to me! Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Ha ha! What a brilliant selection of utterly bonkers beds. I don’t think I could sleep a wink in any of these creations. That standing up gigantic pillow thing is a scary invention. I can imagine employers purchasing these so that their employees can go power nap in a closet and then get straight back to work after 40 winks.

    Liked by 1 person

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.