Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Beloved’s birthday is in a couple of weeks. When we discussed what she’d like for a gift this year, she expressed an interest in a new bag for her laptop. I then attacked the search for exactly the right thing with my usual single-minded zeal.
I was eventually successful at finding THE bag (I hope), but my search made me realize how many hilarious options there are on Etsy. In fact, there are so many tragedies in this category, we may need a part two at some point. I had to forcibly cut myself off, in particular from the felted offerings, which made all my ugly Etsomnia merchandise dreams come true! Proceed with caution: this one is going to burn.
As usual, links to the items for sale appear below each picture. For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts.
IMPORTANT NOTE: If you don’t click on the links in the descriptions, you’re missing half the jokes. Of course, I am talking about the links on random words. Whether or not you click on the sellers’ names is up to you.