My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ Volume 51: Romper Room

25 Comments

Crocheted onesie by PixieSoulCouture

I think there’s something wrong with me. I spotted this and thought, “Yessssss!” 

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

A few years ago, my friend Annie brought something she’d bought out to Fire Island, fully believing it was going to be a fashion-forward item of clothing she’d  get a lot of wear out of that summer. It is hard to describe, but she found a listing for almost exactly the same garment! It looked like Appalachian resort wear. It was the most hilarious, the most unwearable piece of clothing any of us had ever seen. Of course, we all tried it on (men & women of all different sizes). Bizarrely, we could all get into it and get it closed, but everyone looked like a different flavor of crazy in it. It was the ugliest onesie ever (and our house is affectionately referred to as the Ugg Shack), so we dubbed it the Uggsie. The Uggsie is still in the Fire Island closet, and we trot it out once in a while because it makes us laugh. Hard. It is the most People of Walmart item of clothing I’ve ever donned.

So this week is a tribute to the Uggsie. Today, I’m exploring rompers, overalls, jumpsuits, unitards, playsuits, and onesies in the adult clothing category. I’m something of an expert, you know.

NOTE: I am heading out of town, so since I will be blogging from my phone, the next week and a half’s posts will be on time but brief.

As usual, links to the items for sale appear below each picture. For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts. Follow me on Bloglovin!

green adult romper by KathysFunCreations

This is nearly identical to the thing we had to wear for gym at my all-girls’ Catholic high school. It was, in a sense, the ideal garment, because everyone looked equally unfuckable* in it. 
*Sorry. Sometimes, that’s the only word that will do.

Pastel goth adult romper by BannedFromTV

They call this a “pastel goth romper” like that’s a thing

Hot date with a clown but don’t know what to wear? Have no fear: Etsy has got you covered!

Clown-like vintage culottes sold by YellowWoodVintage

I dressed my daughter in this exact item when she was 8 months old. It did a fair job of accommodating her diaper. I assume this adult version is intended to do the same. 

This vintage embroidered cotton jumpsuit is so fresh and beautiful, you could get married in it! By BluegrassVoodoo

This vintage embroidered cotton jumpsuit is so fresh and beautiful, you could get married in it! By BluegrassVoodoo

This model is REALLY feeling this jumpsuit. I dont remember acid wash inspiring this much passion in either the wearer or the observers. Another gem by YellowWoodVintage

This model is REALLY feeling this jumpsuit. This may be the first time acid wash ever inspired this much passion in either the wearer or the observers. Okay. Maybe the second time

Excuse me, but I thought you should know your balls are showing. By LOMStore

Excuse me, but I thought you should know your balls are showing.

Weird low-crotch jumpsuit by Gizda

“This palazzo jumpsuit can make any shape look tall and slender.” If you say so… By the way, the hilarity doesn’t end there

Unlike that penguin-shaped thing, this style looks like it might actually look good on pretty much everyone. By Teyxo

Unlike that penguin-shaped thing, this style looks like it might actually look good on pretty much everyone. By Teyxo

Fetish playsuit featuring their

Fetish playsuit featuring their “signature inflatable mega boob,” which I assume also describes their customers. 

Men, after a long day in the office, are you too tired for romance? If you wear this adult bunny suit around the house, guaranteed no one will bother you for sex. Possibly ever again. 

Denim maternity overalls by Bruvery

The trifecta of maternity clothes! 1. uncomfortable, 2. unflattering, and 3. expensive. 

The perfect jumpsuit for when you want to steal a turkey. By MariaQueenMaria. Note: does anyone else notice the hole in the crotch? What's that for?

The perfect jumpsuit for when you want to shoplift a turkey. Note: What is up with the hole in the crotch? Nevermind. Don’t tell me.

This thing is kind of awesome, as long as you don't object to being mistaken for a sofa. By CrushVintageCandy

This thing is kind of awesome, as long as you don’t object to being mistaken for a 1950’s sofa. 

If you happen to have a 100 flawless body, this would be adorable on you. On the rest of us, its a non-starter. By Luxe9

If you have a 100% flawless body, this would be adorable on you. On the rest of us, it would get weird pretty quickly. By Luxe9

Men's hipster jumpsuit by DrGonzoBerlin

I am certain I have seen this exact dude in Whole Foods. And so far, I haven’t punched him in the windpipe. 

Nope. It's not vintage. Someone out there is actually ready to take your custom order! Hope she's not holding her breath. By KathleenTempleTailor

Nope. It’s not vintage. Someone out there is actually ready to take your custom order! Hope she’s not holding her breath. 

Horribl green vintage jumpsuit sold by ByTheWay

My mother always told me it’s not nice to make fun of the disadvantaged. 

ug 16

Presumably, she’s clutching her stomach because she’s feeling sick after looking in a mirror. Poor thing. 

This seems oddly familiar. By TheLeopardLoungeTX

This seems oddly familiar

As idiotic as these sheer pink overalls are, I included them because shes standing on a toilet. By ShopRachelRector who should consider taking her pictures in the kitchen.

As idiotic as these sheer pink overalls are, the real reason I included is that shes standing on a toilet, holding her lower abdomen like she’s in an IBS commercial. 

Surprisingly beautiful 1970s silk palazzo jumpsuit. By FoundItGreat

Remarkably lovely 1970’s silk palazzo jumpsuit. By FoundItGreat

Really in love with fake leather? More money than taste? Secretly plotting to become a super-villain? Has LenaQuistDesign got the getup for you!

Hopelessly in love with fake leather? More money than taste? Secretly plotting to become a super-villain? Then has Etsy ever got the getup for you!

After this parade of awfuls, I wanted to leave you with something happy. Then I decided to leave you with this pose instead. By GaiaConceptions

After this parade of awfuls, I went looking for something happy to end the post. Then I found this pose instead. You’re welcome. 

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

25 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ Volume 51: Romper Room

  1. how did your place get that name? lol

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well this was by far the best ever, except for all the flashbacks to gym. LOL and yes you needed to use that word.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. For sure today was more of a One BIZARRE Thing day. I’m so glad that you included a few men in all their ridiculousness, too (I especially like the grown man in the bunny suit-you could have used the unf***able on him). Great job!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Usually there are a few things among all the ugly and weird stuff that make me think “I would own that”. Not this week. Yes, maybe two items were passable but probably only look good on people with perfect proportions . Besides, I briefly owned a jumpsuit in the 1980s and I do recall it was a right royal pain in the arse whenever I needed to go for a pee. (Maybe that’s what the crotch hole was for?)

    PS I’m impressed with your phone blogging skills. I suck at using my phone to blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. There are those posts at which you just cannot stop laughing. This is one of them.

    Take your “custom (?)” order? More like your COSTUME order – which weirdo, hack scifi-movie is SHE from!?

    A couple of them are kinda fashionable…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I would not call those creations beautiful today, but funny.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Your chose of hideous rompers is most excellent, although the vintage silk jumpsuit is lovely. And the girl holding the balloons looks like she could be daughter. I don’t see a way to attach a photo or I would send a photo for comparison.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I own a few pieces of clothing where when I bought them I thought, “I am not sure if this is hideous or cool, but I will buy it anyway.” I have actually asked people and the jury was out on a couple items. These are great in a hideously funny kind of way.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Okay, I’m just getting caught up after being out of town (and nice to see you, albeit too briefly) and first thing that happens is you make my eyes burn???

    Liked by 1 person

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