My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ Volume 86: I’ll Drink to That!

10 Comments

This is the "Johnny Walker Liquor Cart." To quote Megan Trainor, "NO." By RodneyAllenTrice

This is the “Johnny Walker Liquor Cart.” To quote Megan Trainor, “NO.” 

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

My friends and I enjoy a cocktail. Don’t get me wrong, we don’t behave like irresponsible 21-year-olds (unless you consider bad dancing irresponsible), and we definitely don’t drink to get drunk, but the carrot at the end of our stick usually takes the form of an ice-cold dirty martini or a great glass of wine. We are therefore very much fans of the paraphernalia of liquor and wine, and Etsy has it in spades. The items run from awesome to awful, with the usual range in between.

As usual, links to the items for sale appear below each picture. For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts.

Etsy, coming to a trailer park near you. And good news. The bikini tops are removable! 

Is that a talking sperm at the bottom left? By BoooTees

Good grief, is that a talking sperm coming out of that shirt?!? By BoooTees

Might not want to bring this one to work. By AshleysCustomApparel

Might not want to bring this one to work. By AshleysCustomApparel

Combo wine rack & gun cabinet. What? No humidor? By RUSTICMOUNTAINCREATI

Combo wine rack and gun cabinet. What? No humidor? 

Now there's a candidate I can get into (literally)! By Funnyflasks

Now there’s a candidate I can get into (literally)! By Funnyflasks

I can't imagine a day bad enough to make me take a drink from this offensive bit of blerg. By PropsandPieces

No matter how much I want a drink, I can’t imagine a day bad enough to make me take one from this horrifying thing. 

Jimmy Durante bottle stopper. Back in the day, I guess this is how you'd know you'd arrived. By UStamp2

I guess in Jimmy Durante’s day, when strangers stuck your disembodied head in their bottles, you’d know you had arrived. 

Boozy gourmet chocolates? Yes, please! By ElixirChocolates

Boozy gourmet chocolates? Yes, please! By ElixirChocolates

I’m not saying it would stop me from drinking, but this glass might force me to drink directly from the bottle. 

Russian vodka carafe and glasses. I'm surprised. I thought Russians really loved vodka, but this looks like a hate crime to me. By VintageofUkraine

Russian vodka carafe and glasses. I thought Russians loved vodka, but this looks to me like a hate crime. 

We have a number of vintage liquor advertising around our house. I've never seen this one. It's a beaut! By Vintagemasters

We have a number of vintage liquor advertising around our house, but I’ve never seen this one. It’s a beaut! By Vintagemasters

I guess I can see why you'd want your own kids' drawings on your coasters, but random kid drawings? By StudioDhomeDecor

I can see why you’d want your own kids’ drawings on your coasters, but a strange kid’s drawings? Why? 

I am fascinated by the crossover style of this drinks trolley. It kind of feels to me like industrial meets turn-of-the-century French flower cart. Yum! By OilfieldSlang

Beer and pretzel lollipops that guarantee a "beer aftertaste." Blerg. By SugarBakersBakery

Beer and pretzel lollipops that guarantee a “beer aftertaste.” I’m guessing the makers aren’t marketing experts. By SugarBakersBakery

Possibly the scariest corkscrew ever. Plus Ernest Borgnine looks like hell. 

WWI artillery shell cocktail shaker. Very handsome, but a bit too grim for me. By StumptownAntiques

WWI artillery shell cocktail shaker. Very handsome, but a bit too grim for me. 

 

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

10 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ Volume 86: I’ll Drink to That!

  1. Having these items in my 1970s cocktail cabinet (currently filled with baking items more than booze) would increase my sobriety. I do love the vintage poster though.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you so much for featuring The Rouler Bar Cart! Love your blog and keep up the awesome work. Here is a link to the item on the Oilfield Slang website.

    http://www.oilfieldslang.com/products/the-rouler-bar-cart

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Incredibly scary corkscrew, and those bikini top koozies are scarier.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Fernet FTW! (Looking forward to having some in San Francisco next month.)

    Liked by 1 person

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