I very rarely re-blog anything, but I saw this article on a friend’s Facebook page (thanks, M.!), and it completely slayed me. I have read it three times, and don’t plan on stopping any time soon. I have a total crush on it. I want to memorize it and steal its jokes for Etsomnia.

The premise is simple. Author Drew Magary starts with a photo and description of a ridiculous item from the Williams-Sonoma catalog, followed by his highly entertaining commentary. He clearly feels about Williams-Sonoma like I feel about Restoration Hardware.

Here’s a sample:

“Did you ever think yourself, “I wish I had a cake with a big red ribbon on it to match my new Lexus, which also has a big red ribbon on it”? Well, you’re in luck. Because now you and your horrible family can coordinate your dessert with your new luxury SUV. Finally, everything is PERFECT.
(Lexus Christmas jingle plays)
(Starving masses take up torches and pitchforks and storm your circular driveway)”

The writer is the phenomenally-talented Drew Magary, an author, a Deadspin columnist, and a correspondent for GQ. This piece has earned him (another) fan for life! To quote Magary, are you ready to lose yourself in a tartan wonderland? Go to it!

And if you love this article as much as I did, here’s 2012, 2013, 2014, and 2015, too!