Etsom·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Can you believe Thanksgiving is just one week away? Nor can I! I thought in honor of the holiday, I’d explore the Thanksgiving turkey theme this week. As expected, the offerings leaned mostly into the realm of terrible taste, with a few lovelies in among the swill. Don’t get me wrong: I love the holiday. It’s just the decor (and “fashion”) I loathe.
For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!
Zombie turkeys are very in this year. Paint-your-own turkey cookie set. Perfect for the kids’ table! By MyBakeryClubAnyone showing up at my house in something this stupid is eating on the porch.Just know if you are hanging this garbage on your door, I’m judging you. Harshly.These have been popping up on my social media feed for a week, and I think they’re growing on me. By SageAdviceVintageClearly, someone worked really hard on this. What a waste of time.Turkey leg pants, because Etsy.These just look x-rated to me.Yay, leg day! By TheJayAndBeeI am not making this up: “Turkeys For Men – The Senator – Dress Left”Calling this a pet costume is overstating it by quite a bit.“Rustic” Thanksgiving centerpiece. I don’t think I could eat while that looked at me.That’s more like it! Bronze turkey by PrairieDanceStudioThat’s a turkey? Are you sure you weren’t thinking of something else?Ever wonder where your embarrassing cousin finds her holiday wear? Wonder no more.“…And that was the day I became a vegetarian.”Sometimes the item title says it all: “Thanksgiving Turkey Designer Cookie”Yummmmmmm…. By AllSpiceEmporiumThis is a “festive Thanksgiving” toilet paper holder. Makes me thankful I won’t be going to their house for the holiday.Turkeys are so ugly, not even Christopher Radko can make them look good!“Turkey poop” holiday candy. All the nope.Anyone else see this?
First of all, can we launch a rescue mission for that emotionally abuse hedgehog? Second of all, I didn’t think there was going to be a garment worse than those turkey leg pants but that bonkers burlap sack “dress” took the lead. The undies make me think of that description of a pathetic penis looking like “the last turkey in the store at Christmas” (or is that just a saying in my family?)
).
November 21, 2019 at 8:18 am
You just have to wonder.
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November 21, 2019 at 9:50 am
Indeed you do!
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November 21, 2019 at 10:56 am
🙂 NO NO and NO — Hal
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November 21, 2019 at 4:31 pm
Ha! Agreed.
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November 21, 2019 at 3:12 pm
First of all, can we launch a rescue mission for that emotionally abuse hedgehog? Second of all, I didn’t think there was going to be a garment worse than those turkey leg pants but that bonkers burlap sack “dress” took the lead. The undies make me think of that description of a pathetic penis looking like “the last turkey in the store at Christmas” (or is that just a saying in my family?)
).
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November 21, 2019 at 6:24 pm
#FreeTheHedgehog
So that USED to be just a saying in your family. It’s now also going to be a saying in mine.
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November 21, 2019 at 9:22 pm
😂😂😂😂😂
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December 1, 2019 at 1:07 pm
That cat face though! I can tell that s/he is thrilled.
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December 1, 2019 at 3:56 pm
There’s nothing as hilarious as a pissed-off cat.
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