What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ 180: Bed Time


Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

We are (finally) gearing up for another season in Cherry Grove, Fire Island, the happiest place on Earth*. This year, our room needs a new bed cover, so I’ve been hunting around for just the right thing. Let the hilarity ensue!
*Individual results may vary

My search took me past all of Etsy’s worst tricks: itchy, ugly, extra, and unrelated, but there were some real standouts, too! The offerings ranged from soothing to not to just plain rude, but at least a lot of it was interesting. Even some of the upcycled stuff exceeded expectations!

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!

bed 1

I didn’t think mammals were supposed to lay eggs…

A woman and her freakishly-large-knit blanket, the love that dare not speak its name.

I’m not much of a quilt person, but this library quilt is fantastic! By QuiltCrush

What is a tortilla doing in a post about bedding? Guess… By RetroArtDecor

Alright, who backed over the 1990s lesbian with a steamroller?

Newborn nest? Ballet flat? Life raft? Who cares? It’s adorable! By KauriShop

As if the bedding weren’t dramatic enough, here’s something icky made from old bedspreads!

While we’re upcycling, this is a rug made from old bedspreads. I guess they’re better on the floor than on you but still. Yuck.

If I didn’t think they’d make fun of me, this would be on its way to Fire Island right now! By TrueloveQuiltsForYou

This nightmare is made from bridesmaid dresses. Looks like somebody needs better friends.

I see why this quilt made of old baby clothes could have sentimental value, but I think it would give me nightmares about rolling over and suffocating baby.

Yes, I know how impractical it is, but JUST LOOK AT IT. By FuzzyToast

I have no proof that bad taste begins at birth, but I’m sure a badly-dressed crib is going to do some kind of damage.

“Jaunty Hearse Crib Quilt” just screams teen pregnancy.

Coulrophobia starter kit


Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

23 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ 180: Bed Time

  1. I hear the Steamrolled Lesbians are trying to bring back Lilith Fair.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. You just never know what will rock someones boat.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I didn’t realize you go to Fire Island. I love it there and go every year! These are definitely interesting choices and I think they would give me nightmares lol. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The 90’s lesbian and bridesmaids quotes had me laughing out loud–now I have to explain myself to those within earshot.
    Thanks so much for a chance to laugh.
    I love the library quilt. I would probably hang it on the wall and hope the neighbours look through my windows and think I am well read.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I didn’t even know that was supposed to be a turtle…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. There are some stunning quilts in your selection. I always marvel at the skill of quilters but I love that the ones you selected were rainbow and fresh and modern while also connecting to tradition. I love that someone thought to make comfy furniture for a guinea pig and then named it a chubby chair. Despite my clown phobia, I think the worst item in your blog post this time is the bedlinen that looks blood spattered. Maybe it appeals to CSI fans but it just made me think of sleeping on a gigantic sanitary towel – you know the ones the school nurse used to give you in desperate times?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I may never sleep again.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. The best thing about this post is your captions. I see a stand-up routine for you: projecting your Etsy finds and describing them…think Ted Talks.

    Liked by 1 person

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