Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

I give Etsy makers a hard time, but I have to hand it to them. Their ranks include some of the most creative, talented, artistic people I’ve ever encountered. This week, I decided to take a look at futuristic clothing and accessories, and few of my searches have turned up more eye-popping, one-of-a-kind surprises – both good and, well, other – than this one did.

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!