What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ 246: Etsy Modeling 101


Etsom·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

During my weekly obsessive perusing of Etsy, I’ve noticed a trend toward unusual poses. I assume the idea is to grab shoppers’ attention on a website that’s over-full with competitors, but some of them go way beyond “Look at me” and head on over to “Look away.” I thought it was a topic worth exploring. No good ones this week, just head-scratchers.

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!

When in doubt, be a little teapot
When all the drugs kick in at once.
When the voices in your head are too loud to hear the photographer.
When posing, it’s best not to attempt activities you don’t know how to do. Like sitting.
…And pointing.
When you are asked to model a cock-and-balls top, and you just think “fuck it.”
When you’re being all serious, then somebody puts on your jam.
When you have forgotten how legs work.
Nope, that’s not it either.
Definitely not. (Is she giving birth to that pillow?)
Still not right.
When the clothing you’re modeling is so dumb, it causes spontaneous backward evolution.
When your Geico commercial audition doesn’t work out.
When all you want to do is scratch.
When someone tells you to hit a yoga pose (but you don’t know yoga).
When you’re good at yoga (but bad at tidying up).
When you really, really want to be noticed.
When you need to hurry up and get the photo before building security arrives.
When you’ve been watching too much Monty Python.

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

10 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ 246: Etsy Modeling 101

  1. Oh goodness…they need to ‘get a life’.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. HaHaHa – loved the models that were brave enough to do this. Fun way to start the morning. OH, I hope I wasn’t meant to take this seriously. Hal

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Omgosh. I cannot stop laugh crying.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I suspect some of these models are also the makers but, in the case of those who were press-ganged by friends into modelling, I do hope they received danger money to cover physical injuries and embarrassment related trauma. Also, thanks for the “Hands Up” earworm. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Trying to figure out what’s being sold is half the fun!

    Liked by 1 person

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