My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ Volume 63: Halloween Regrets

11 Comments

horns 0

Not a shower cap

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

Costume wise, my crew is kind of dialing it in this Halloween. As much as I love a costume opportunity, this year’s plans, while exceptionally fabulous, don’t actually require a costume. I got Bestie and I fairly simple matching custom-made horns (thanks, RepliKateIt!), and Beloved may condescend to pop in her fangs (which she quite likes), but that and some fierce makeup is really all we’re doing this year.

Initially, this felt like a relief. No scrambling around, trying to find obscure costume items that may or may not exist, no frantic, late-night sewing, no expedited shipping from China, no watching for the mailman like a terrier with a bad attitude. The horns arrived on time and were exactly what I wanted, I bought some red eyelashes, sewed some embellishments on a tunic (I had to sew something on something, after all. I’m not a complete heathen), and then I was done. But as we’ve gotten closer, I find myself pining for those days of ridiculous, complicated, over-the-top costumes.  I love my new horns, but they are low-key and minimal and, dare I say it, tasteful. I could almost wear them to work. Who did I think I was buying them for? I should have gotten something a foot tall that lights up or spins or shoots out bubbles or something!

That’s okay. We’ll look really cute, we’ll be comfortable, and I can always live vicariously through my darlings at Etsy.

By the way, one very good thing came out of my under-doing this year’s costume. I now have a new favorite band name. Ladies and gentlemen (men…men…men…), put your hands together (gether…gether…gether…) for…

With Apologies to Brittany from RepliKateIt

With Apologies to Brittany from RepliKateIt

As usual, links to the items for sale appear below each picture. For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts. Follow me on Bloglovin!

Very scary-looking teeth horns that will definitely stay in place and not flop around hilariously. By SerrannaNshannon

Very scary-looking Smurf teeth horns that will definitely stay in place and not flop around hilariously

Wowie! I would be fierce in this thing! However, I would have to dress outside the club, since I wouldn't be able to stand upright in our tiny house (or ride in a car, for that matter) while wearing it. By FirebirdLeather

Wowie! This feathered horned helmet thing is amazing! However, I would have to dress outside the club, since it’s too tall for me to stand upright in our tiny house (or ride in a car or the subway, for that matter). By FirebirdLeather

There's nothing particularly wrong with this wig, I just found the picture hilarious and needed to include it. By KatiesDid

There’s nothing particularly wrong with this wig, I just found the picture hilarious and needed to include it. Cabbage Patch wig (does anyone else see Billy Gardell?) by KatiesDid

Anyone else suddenly thirsty? By PoshFairyTaleCouture, who more than redeemed themselves with this

Anyone else suddenly thirsty? Too-Gaga-for-even-Gaga headdress by PoshFairyTaleCouture, who more than redeemed themselves with this

On the other hand, this alleged Gaga fascinator missed the mark by miles. By LeaLeaMer

On the other hand, this so-called fascinator is more gag than Gaga

Remember Medusa? The creature in Greek mythology who had an out-of-control potted planton her head? Me, neither. By ChikiBird

Remember Medusa? The monster in Greek mythology who had live snakes instead of hair? This version reminds me of something else entirely

As silly as the potted plant headdress is, at least it won't make you look homeless. By GhouliaPeculiar

As silly as that overgrown house plant headdress is, at least it won’t make you look completely unhinged

The artistry of some of the makers on Etsy is really unbelievable. This is perfect. By RedHandedProps

The artistry of some of the makers on Etsy is really unbelievable. This foam (!) helmet is perfect! By RedHandedProps

Cardboard dog helmet. Yes. I said dog helmet. By EndureDesigns

“Upcycled” cardboard dog helmet. Yes, I said dog helmet

You know how I said I wanted something that lit up? This isn't it. By WalkerOddities

You know how I said I wanted something that lit up? This isn’t it. From the same seller who makes this

Nope. Don't want this one either. Turns out there's something of a gap in the light-up-wig market! By DressYourHedonism

Good grief. Not this one either. Turns out there’s a gap in the non-hideous light-up-headdress market! 

Foam Lucille Ball wig. At least it would be very absorbent if you got sweaty. By LadyMallemour

Bizarre foam Lucille Ball wig. At least it would cushion your head if you got fall-down drunk

On the other hand, this Geisha wig is an absolute knock-out! Yum! By GhouliaPeculiar

On the other hand, this Geisha wig is an absolute knock-out! Yum! By GhouliaPeculiar

Our old friends at BubblesAndFrown turned up something wonderful when I went looking for something ocean-themed

Our old friends at BubblesAndFrown turned up something wonderful when I went looking for an oceanic headdress

Score! It isn't often you find an aquatic-themed headdress that's both lumpy AND itchy. And great news! It doubles as a neckpiece! By SquidDivision

It isn’t often you find an aquatic-themed headdress that’s both lumpy AND itchy. And great news! It doubles as a collar so you can wear it ALL THE TIME!

$250K

And leading the WTF category is this $250K “Failed attempt at a cat head costume mask thingy.” What do you think? Performance art? Joke? Lost a bet? Mental illness? 

Marie Antoinette Walk of Shame wig. By CrudeThings

Marie Antoinette Walk of Shame wig

I can’t believe I found this wig too late. It would have been perfect for me. I could have gone as a hot flash! By SweetHayseed

This is pretty cute as spider web hats go, but I can't help feeling like Barbie dries her clothes on that thing. By BatcakesCouture

This is pretty cute as spider web hats go, but I can’t help feeling like Barbie hangs her clothes out to dry on that thing. By BatcakesCouture

This “festive” spider hat is so depressing, even the mannequin looks like she needs a prozac

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

11 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ Volume 63: Halloween Regrets

  1. Bizarre, and again, love your captions!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I need the elven ears. NEED THEM!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. These are weird wonderful and definitely made to make us laugh admiringly?

    Liked by 1 person

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