
If nothing else, you have to respect its self awareness.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Many of my Etsy searches go off the rails when I hit the Fiber Arts category. Some of it is true art, but today, I’d like to show you some of the nuttier items I have found recently. Of course, as with all Etsy categories, there were also desirable, adorable, creative, shockingly beautiful items, but you know how I love to chase down those terribles!
For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!

I don’t understand most of it, but the nooses do seem on point.

I know so many people who would love this! By FemmeThreads

Please tell me I’m not the only one who see it.

It’s not what you think…

“Reactions to the bag is either complete love and adoration to discust and repulsion. I feel that is what makes it so special.” In case you were wondering, I fall firmly in the ‘discust’ camp.

Weiner dog on a stick. Awkward, though the dog doesn’t seem to mind.

The cutest felted hedgehog in the world. By GladOArt who can satisfy all your hedgehog cravings. Seriously.

This is a sweater monster. So is this.

Here’s a cute, cuddly dissected rat for your kid’s room! That ought to help the little brats sleep!

Amazing! By RedWorkStitches

I’m not saying I could do better. I’m just saying I’d have the sense not to try to sell it for $130.

Sometimes I wonder if aliens have landed and filled Etsy with social experiments to see what we’ll do.

Look! It’s an art wanna-bee!

Joy is not the first word that comes to mind.

This claims to be a sheep made from an old bedspread and a rusty bed spring. I assume it’s stuffed with used tissues in the name of authenticity.

Toilet paper cosy. You know, for when you have to Pope.

It’s amazing how much squee they can pack into something so tiny. By LamLinh
March 9, 2017 at 7:31 am
We have a pair of pet rats in our house; I imagine that if I hung that dissection mock-up on the wall, they might take it as a death threat.
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March 9, 2017 at 8:04 am
As well they should! And maybe that’s what the Rat snuff art is for. I certainly can’t think of any other reason for its existence.
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March 9, 2017 at 8:05 am
The best part of ETSOMNIA is always your commentary. Priceless.
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March 9, 2017 at 9:54 am
Thank you!
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March 9, 2017 at 12:55 pm
Can’t say I liked any of this….well perhaps the hedgehog was too cute for comfort…but all it looks like to me are excuses for more cat hair to get caught in. Loved the viewing process though soooooo THANX. ~~dru~~
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March 9, 2017 at 5:58 pm
I think you know my kids well enough by now through the magic of the internet to not be surprised when I say that they would actually want that dissected rat art. Indeed, they found a dead frog today and dissected it with sharp sticks. Little gems.
As far as favourites go, I can’t decide between the hedgehog and the feminist embroidery. The items that made me laugh the most were the elephant camera dong, penis-faced bunny, and Sloth as a handbag.
Thank you, as always, for the chuckles.
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March 9, 2017 at 6:22 pm
Very glad you enjoyed them, and no, it doesn’t surprise me that the dissected rat art would be popular in your house. Children are hilariously weird, aren’t they?
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March 9, 2017 at 6:54 pm
They are indeed. I wouldn’t have it any other way either.
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March 10, 2017 at 7:37 pm
Oh! It’s LENS COZY. Right . . . .
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March 10, 2017 at 8:10 pm
Creepy, right?
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March 14, 2017 at 1:52 pm
hihih to Pope or not to Pope. 😀 Slaying commentary as we’re accustomed.
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March 14, 2017 at 3:08 pm
Thank you! I confess that was probably one of my favorite captions of all time.
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