What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ 290: Rock On


Etsom·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

We have begun our holiday gift shopping, and there are a number of toddlers on our list this year. This got me thinking about rocking toys. I remember having a deadly metal rocking horse much like the one above. It had rusty springs (perfect for pinching tender little fingers), and sharp edges, and was gratuitously high off the ground. When you rocked on it, it would send forth a shrieking sound like rusty metal and lost souls were having a rave. The thing would periodically throw a spring and unceremoniously dump the rider to the ground. It was the actual antithesis of child-safe design. I, of course, thought it the most magnificent toy ever, and I rocked and shrieked with wild abandon, no matter how many times it tried to kill me. Toys these days are significantly safer, but I’ll bet they’re not loved half as much as my murder horse was!

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!

You knew there had to be at least one overdressed Etsy tragedy, right?
The big one that DIDN’T get away! By RockinRelicsCo
Fun, plus it would make a great sobriety test! By WooduToys
Anyone else think this “functional decor” looks like it’s from the Grinch’s holiday collection?
This stable-looking and cute rocking dog would be a welcome addition to any playroom! By HandcraftsByRasa
What lovely workmanship! By OKeefeCreationsLLC
This is a rocking horse made to be ridden by two children at once. You know, Double Derp.
I am of two minds about this Walter Papst rocking horse from 1960. On the one hand, the design is spare and wonderful, but on the other, it’s a bit stark for a child’s room. I would nonetheless be pleased to have it in my house. Sold by FrankfurtMinimal.
Truly beautiful ride-on elephant. By TreeSounds
Big Bird looks like he’s wondering where he went wrong…
This swan is beautiful AND budget-friendly! By KidsyShopOnline
These wooden rocking motorcycle plans would be such a fun project! By BestForYouArt
Someone has been overfeeding that horse!
Rocking Moose is my new favorite band name! By FarmhouseBuilder
What a glorious antique! Sold by RabidRabbitAntiques
On the other end of the antique spectrum is this, which looks like a good source of lead paint.
Wonderful! By ToysWorldStore
This is just gorgeous (and the cat would love it). By FabulousRugs
“… I been through the desert on a horse with no nose…”

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

11 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ 290: Rock On

  1. You have outdone yourself with the commentary on these, Donna. I think “Rocking Moose” would do a killer cover of “Horse with No Nose” – worth the cover charge! I, too, had a murder horse and he was the most magnificent toy EVER!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Lol! Murder horse…memories for sure. We found one on the streetside and brought it home to repaint. Red,white and blue of course. New springs helped a lot , We could hear my first born son at all hours of the night riding with his cowboy hat on . Many hours of pleasure.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. The Pabst would be perfect for an adult who has occasional child visitors: art most of the time and then a rocking horse when the kiddies come. (And, oh, how those springs hurt when they pinched!!!)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I never had one. MY

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Again, I never had one. My two sons never had one. But my grandkids did have one and they seemed to enjoy ‘riding’ it. As for the one posted by Donna today, all of them are nice, even the very old one. Hal

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Great memories from long ago!

    Liked by 1 person

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