Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Ballroom dancing costumes are not really a category about which I would have expected to write an edition of Etsomnia™, but when I came across some of these getups AND SAW THEIR PRICES, I couldn’t resist.

I understand that performance wear tends to be over-the-top, but I always associated ballroom dancing with glorious, flowy outfits. When did so many of them turn into studies in terrible taste? Oh, right. In the eighties, like everything else. Unfortunately, they never moved on.

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!