Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

My Etsomnia inspirations come to me from many different sources. Sometimes, the week’s topic is inspired by something I’m trying to find for myself, sometimes it’s the season, sometimes it’s something I’ve seen online. But I confess that today’s was entirely inspired by the adorable pig print above (and the caption that instantly popped into my head). So here we are. Barnyard week? Sure. Why not?

Turns out as long as you like puns, farm folks are pretty funny. I encountered more dad jokes in the first couple of pages of search results than for any search I’ve ever done before. Some of the results were really impressive, and the rest mostly didn’t fulfill my worst fears about what goes on in farm country…

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!