What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?

Etsomnia™ 330: He Sees You When You’re Crafting


Etsom·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Hope everyone is having a happy holiday season! This should put an end to that. (Sorry/not sorry.) Today, we’re looking at some of the more unfortunate Christmas ornament and decor offerings on Etsy, and let me tell you, there were a lot of contenders! Animals seemed to be involved in some of the odder ornament choices, though babies, angels, and teeth were also heavily featured.

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!

Fellow blogger Alison sent me this festive gem, and it inspired today’s post!
Hey, look! It’s Carl… of the Bells!
Too far
I grew up with a fake Christmas tree (which is why I will never use one again), but this would definitely have helped. By ChristmasTreeHugger
Oh, deer…
I knew someone who looked just like this! Not the face so much, but definitely the cupcake body.
Black rat in Candyland. How festive!
For the person who has everything: a “tree fascinator.”
Just hilarious! By WoolgatheringJo
Sage advice…
Nothing to see here. Just your traditional Karl Malden angel with pentagram.
I was alarmed until I realized this refers to the video game Oregon Trail. Then I was just depressed.
I shudder to think how this thing came about
The search term taxidermy ornament turned up some, er, unexpected results.
Who knew angels came in Super Plus!

Author: Donna from MyOBT

I have committed to spending part of every day looking for at least one beautiful thing, and sharing what I find with you lovelies!

27 thoughts on “Etsomnia™ 330: He Sees You When You’re Crafting

  1. As usual, Etsomnia is shockingly hilarious. The cat in the tree should go viral though!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. These offerings are all hilariously hideous except for the fake bark for the artificial tree. That is actually pretty genius and, as someone who has a fake tree (allergies) I might just have to investigate that further.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I just LOL’D at the “Super Plus” angel. You are a genius!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I must admit that I did laugh at a few of them. None of them would ever be in my house, even if Walmart sold them. 🙂 Hal

    Liked by 3 people

  5. We are all different but some of us are really strange.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. They are all so odd. Is the animal in the top photo a hippo, lol. This post is an example of why I could never sell anything on Etsy–it would end up looking like the tree fascinator and my friends and family would not be truthful with me about my artistic talents.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Poor cats…the butt of so many of these things. Well, there is pear-shaped, and instead of apple-shaped, we’ll just call it cupcake-shaped. So much better.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I was suitably appalled by them all (except the cat butt which I love) – but it wasn’t me who sent the festive croc 😂 Thanks for the mention though.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. My sister and I hit some of Austin’s best vintage/thrift stores today and saw some rather horrific things. Yet the only thing I photographed was not a Christmas ornament, but something I saw that I knew you need to see. Text photo coming tomorrow; you’ve been warned.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Absolutely hilarious, thanks for that!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Pingback: Etsomnia™ 331: Holiday Glass | My OBT

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