Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

I pride myself on my Christmas stockings. I’ve made many of them over the years, and they’re pretty darned cute if I do say so myself. So I consider myself something of an expert on the subject. I am a true appreciator of the beautiful ones, and I can’t abide the ugly ones. As expected, Etsy is chock-a-block full of both.

For more Etsy fun, check out all my weekly Etsomnia™ posts!