Worst of McMansions
McMansions on Parade:
Category Archives: Humor
Etsomnia™ 110: Hell’s Kitchen
This is a kitchen angel dish towel. She’s meant to keep your kitchen safe, presumably by warding off people with taste.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 109: Crooked
Elephant Man party of one, your table is ready.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 108: Costume Madness 2016
Unicorns, now with more dildo.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Without Music
Etsomnia™ 107: Put on Your Big Girl Pants
If a teardrop tattoo means that you murdered someone, I shudder to think what a teardrop on the seat of your pants would mean…
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Continue reading
Blamo!
BlamoToys
It’s Pronounced Tar-JAY
The Poopocalypse
Jesse Newton
I need something funny. Do you need something funny? Good. Here it is.
Maybe funny is the wrong word. It’s only funny to me because it didn’t happen to me. Let’s just call it entertaining with a happy ending. (No, not that. Get your minds out of the gutter. Honestly, you people…)
So, last week, something pretty tragic happened in our household. It’s taken me until now to wrap my head around it…
Posted by Jesse Newton on Tuesday, August 9, 2016
Etsomnia™ 106: Derpocalypse Now
The twins looked at each other in horror. She wanted to put her feet WHERE?!?
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 105: Bad Hair Day
I can’t decide. Do you think wearing this barrette would discourage subway frottage, or attract it?
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 104: Sheer Madness
These super-stylish pants are made of 100% nope.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) Continue reading
Gymnastic Clown
Tweeting: the Newest Olympic Sport
Baby Love?
Etsomnia™ 102: Deep Pockets
$250,000. Million dollar tee. I guess it must be on clearance.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 101: Why? Because Etsy
This listing is called “Hair ball by famous artist.” I think maybe they should define “famous,” and, for that matter, “artist.”
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
The Funniest Obituaries!
Jewish mothers are a special kind of funny. Continue reading
State of Mime
America’s Got Talent (and tape!)
Etsomnia™ 99: Exotica
The materials listed for these shorts are leather and exotic. They forgot to mention the main material, ugly.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
“Cute? Baby ducks are cute, I HATE cute! I want to be exotic!” -Annie Savoy in Bull Durham
My OBT 