My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?


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Etsomnia™ 123: OOAK

Where did clowns shop before Etsy?

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week. Continue reading


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Etsomnia™ 122: The Unwearables

Someone left my face out in the rain...

Very handy if you live too close to a sewage plant or spend any time around teenage boys.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week. Continue reading


12 Comments

Etsomnia™ 119: You’re the Top

Nevermind Elf on the Shelf. Want to keep the kiddies in line? Try this thing.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Continue reading


13 Comments

Etsomnia™ 117: Hold That Pose 2

I don’t mean to sound like a know-it-all, but I have had arms most of my life, and she is doing it wrong.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Continue reading


14 Comments

Etsomnia™ 115: Embellished to Death

As seen on the Hoarders wedding episode, “Say Yes to the Mess!”

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Continue reading


25 Comments

Etsomnia™ 114: Movember

Now THATs a mustache! By FacialHairLeague

Now THAT’s a mustache! By FacialHairLeague

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Continue reading


11 Comments

Etsomnia™ 112: Lunatic Fringe

This poor soul can't even figure out how to work fringe. On the other hand, he also couldn't remember pants, so maybe he's just not that bright.

This poor soul can’t even figure out how to work his stupid shirt. On the other hand, he also couldn’t remember pants, so maybe there’s a pattern emerging.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.

Continue reading