My OBT

What if you spent every day looking for One Beautiful Thing?


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Etsomnia™ Volume 51: Romper Room

Crocheted onesie by PixieSoulCouture

I think there’s something wrong with me. I spotted this and thought, “Yessssss!” 

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume 50*: Toys R Us

This mole mask is listed as a kid's birthday favor. What kid wants a mole-themed birthday party? By fAverittecreations

This mole mask is listed as a kid’s birthday favor. What kid wants a mole-themed birthday party? And why is it being modeled by a grown man? Creepy much?

*In honor of the 50th issue of Etsomnia™, I’ve decided to do away with the stupid Roman numerals.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
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Etsomnia™ Volume XLIX: Death by Bedazzling

Glitter!

Translation: OMG! Glitter!

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XLVIII: Animal Crackers

What's more sexy than a naked mole rat costume? How about a naked mole rat in a box? By MissNessaMonster

What’s more sexy than a naked mole rat costume? How about a naked mole rat in a box?

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XLVI: Mermaids Are Us!

Words to live by. Print by HeidisHubbub

Words to live by. Print by HeidisHubbub

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) Continue reading →


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Etsomnia™ Volume XLV: Pure Jean-ius

You’ve probably been wondering what it would look like to cut out all the most unflattering parts of a pair of jeans and plaster them onto a suit. Well, my friends, the wait is over! By BURBOKture

You’ve probably been wondering what it would look like to cut out all the most unflattering parts of a pair of jeans and plaster them onto a suit. Well, my friends, the wait is over! 

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XLIV: Etsom-nom-nomnia

For just $45, you can have your family members depicted as pigs, or donkeys, or whatever those other things are. By HeavenlyBakedGoods

For just $45, you can get a “Happy Birthday Ugly” cake and have your family members depicted as pigs, or donkeys, or whatever those other things are.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XLIII: Not the Brightest Bulbs

When it comes to lamps (and most other things), cherubs are almost always a bad idea. Sold by Bleuets

When it comes to lamps (and everything else), cherubs are almost always a bad idea. Even the dog looks disgusted.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XLI: Ermahgerd! Prerm!*

*Translation: Oh My God, Prom!

Me and my headless date, 1979. (Mom was always cutting the heads off my prom dates.)

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XL: Mother’s Day Madness

When you care enough to give the very least. By RubysRubbish, who clearly has some mommy issues to work out

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXIX: Derby Day

Perhaps the biggest fascinator in the history of fascination. By BWerson74

Perhaps the largest fascinator in the history of fascination. By my hero BWerson74, who offers many fabulous / crazy hat choices

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXVIII: Bathing . . . Beauties?

bath 0 ComicWomenEt·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXVII: It’s In the Bag

Dear Etsy, You complete me. Love, Donna. By MariaAgafos

Oh, Etsy, how I love thee!

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXVI: Picture This

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXV: The Gestation Boogie

Not for the overly sensitive knocked up ladies. By UnhingedDesigns

Not for the overly sensitive knocked up ladies. By UnhingedDesigns

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXIV: Dress For “Success”

Plaid flannel

Plaid flannel “Power Business Suit.” Maybe if you worked here.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXIIIa: Souvenirs R Us

The ultimate international item: Netherlands souvenir, shipped from the U.S., and made in . . . let’s say it together . . . China.

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXIII: Put a Ring on It

You know some asshole is going to use this to propose to his girl. THIS DOES NOT COUNT AS A TWO CARAT RING!!! By BlueberryHeadShop, who should be ashamed of themselves.

You know some bone-head is going to use this to propose to his girl. A proposal is no time to make a bad joke, and THIS DOES NOT COUNT AS A TWO CARAT RING!!!

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

DEAR PORN HUNTERS: Don’t let the “XXX” in the title fool you. Unless you are planning on proposing to some lucky* girl, you have come to the wrong place. Sorry for the confusion. Happy hunting!
*individual results may vary

-The Management

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXII: Fan Friction

Just your basic awesome Madonna narwhal. By HayleyCassatt, who has kind of a narwhal fetish

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

DEAR PORN HUNTERS: In spite of the suggestively-dressed narwhal at right, you have come to the wrong place. The “XXX” in the title is merely a roman numeral. Sorry to have excited you unduly. See you next week, when the narwhal will be replaced with a similarly titillating picture of a toilet paper cosy or something.

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Etsomnia™ Volume XXXI: Green Day

I never seem to have anything appropriate to wear on St. P’s Day. Maybe this year, I should get myself one of these. By NoSleevesNoProblems

Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)

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