Rude.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
When you care enough to send the very best?
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Happy Valentine’s Day! Here’s an edible baby! This listing claims it’s “the Perfect I LOVE you gift for your love one.” If your “love one” is the witch from Hansel & Gretel, maybe.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Happy Thursday! It’s time for a Very Special Episode of Etsomnia! Continue reading
Oh, no! You’re all dressed for your wedding but you just realized your bladder is full! What to do? Have no fear. Etsy to the rescue!
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Has this ever happened to you?
I went looking for the ugliest vintage lamp on Etsy, and when I saw this thing, I knew my search was over. $85 “Rustic” fish lamp.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Vin·tage /ˈvin-tij/ noun. 1. a period in which something was made or was begun. 2. your old crap which you manage to sell to someone else. See also Garbage.
Decoupaged “Reimagined Stiletto Boot Handbag” whose maker suffers from a slight Pat Benatar fetish.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
De·cou·page (/dāko͞oˈpäZH/), noun, 1. the art or craft of decorating objects with paper cut-outs. 2. gluing junk on other junk.
Thursday is Etsomnia day! (I really feel like that needs a jingle. Don’t you think?)
A mere $6,279.04 will put this “upcycled” entry mirror near your door. I’m guessing it’s intended to scare away visitors.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Happy New Year! It’s time for the first Etsomnia of 2015!
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Unless you’re married to a cop, I don’t recommend wearing these on a date. (I bought three pairs.) By Komawo
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
I decided that Etsy critique didn’t feel right on Christmas day, so Etsomnia day is coming a little early this week!
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et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
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Nightmare-inducing clown decanter. The seller calls it a “Great Christmas Gift”
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
“Thanks, I’d rather just have coal.”
Super-classy iPhone dock and drinks holder. (Rusting trailer and yard full of car parts not included.)
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
Happy Thursday! It’s Etsomnia time once again. Continue reading
If this doesn’t put you in the holiday spirit, you are clearly dead inside. Or have better taste.
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
Happy Friday! Etsomnia may be a day late, but I think it was worth the wait.
“Hippy Mixed Media Collage Art”
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
“If we could but paint with the hand what we see with the eye.” -Honore de Balzac
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Statement necklaces are this goofy trend that suggests you can casually pair the crown jewels with a t-shirt and dirty sweatpants and magically look effortlessly chic (see picture right, which is definitely NOT me). Continue reading
Enjoy your special day! Gratuitously voluminous silk dress on gratuitously sulky model.
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
Sir, go home and put on an undershirt, preferably over the “shark” cardigan. That thing’s hideous.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
New York sweater weather always inspires me to go hunting. Continue reading
When it comes to costumes, there’s no excuse for lazy.
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
You may recall this doghouse from the Wee Edition of Etsomnia™. It got me thinking. By Jumahl
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.”
― Groucho Marx
For all of you ecologically-conscious pimps out there, here’s a green faux fur creation. (To be fair, most of this maker’s hats are lovely. Just not this one.)
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
“A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.” – P.J. O’Rourke
Fantastic skill combined with atrocious taste.
*Please don’t.
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
During my search for the Etsy disasters and desirables in last week’s Fail Edition, I came across such an embarrassment of tragic neckwear, I decided they needed their own Etsomnia™ post. Continue reading
et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered in one’s sleep.
Okay, I might have doctored this a little. However, the sideways kidney was already there.“No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face.” ― John Donne, who should prepare to be disappointed
My OBT 