Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Category Archives: Etsomnia™
Etsomnia™ 124: Resort

Hope you like grilled pineapple, because this girl looks like she is going to buuuuurn.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 123: OOAK

Where did clowns shop before Etsy?
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week. Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 122: The Unwearables

Very handy if you live too close to a sewage plant or spend any time around teenage boys.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week. Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 121: Hot Date

I understand that calendars can be very specific, but shirtless men and rabbits feels more like a weird fetish than a niche. Then again, maybe I missed a trend.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 120: Wrap It Up

Kanye on one side, Kim on the other. How would you decide? It’s like the Sophie’s Choice of wrapping paper. And I’m sorry to report it’s not the only Kim Kardashian holiday paper.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 119: You’re the Top

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 118: Four Large!

Oh, how I love this Signed Numbered Al Hirshfeld print of Marilyn Monroe sold by BlkBttrflyDsgns
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 117: Hold That Pose 2

I don’t mean to sound like a know-it-all, but I have had arms most of my life, and she is doing it wrong.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 116: Wigging Out!!

Sia would love this! Of course, she has an assistant to keep her from crashing into things…
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 115: Embellished to Death

As seen on the Hoarders wedding episode, “Say Yes to the Mess!”
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. The surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 114: Movember

Now THAT’s a mustache! By FacialHairLeague
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 113: Haunted* House!

Somebody pass me the bug spray.
*Haunted by bad taste, primarily
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ 112: Lunatic Fringe

This poor soul can’t even figure out how to work his stupid shirt. On the other hand, he also couldn’t remember pants, so maybe there’s a pattern emerging.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) 3. An excuse for me to be an obnoxious, snarky New Yorker once per week.
Etsomnia™ Volume 111: Sweater Weather

The upcyclers are at it again. I think I just upcycled a little in my mouth.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 110: Hell’s Kitchen

This is a kitchen angel dish towel. She’s meant to keep your kitchen safe, presumably by warding off people with taste.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 109: Crooked

Elephant Man party of one, your table is ready.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.) Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 108: Costume Madness 2016

Unicorns, now with more dildo.
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Etsomnia™ 107: Put on Your Big Girl Pants

If a teardrop tattoo means that you murdered someone, I shudder to think what a teardrop on the seat of your pants would mean…
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
Continue reading
Etsomnia™ 106: Derpocalypse Now

The twins looked at each other in horror. She wanted to put her feet WHERE?!?
Et·som·ni·a (/etˈsämnēə/), noun, 1. a sleep disorder caused by obsessive Etsy browsing. 2. the surprising arrival of weird handmade merchandise ordered when one is only half conscious. (True story.)
